Good morning Bachelor Bracket!

I’m doing a short and sweet summary today because a) I’m having a fun Cape-cation and b) the Women Tell All is the worst. I didn’t love them being bullies when it aired the first time, I don’t need to watch the highlight reel.

We have no scoring updates but you should fill out your brackets for Fantasy Suites next week!

Some highlights from the Women Tell All…

Katie vs. The House

We start the night by having the women talk about whether or not the house was toxic and it turns out that apparently nothing is on fire until you point out it is??

Familiar Faces?

We also see most of the women (noticeably absent was Magi though, I feel cheated) but in a funny twist anytime that they pan to the entire squad, Heather is not included. But if you take a look in some other scenes she is. Poor Heather, not even getting her Instagram followers.

Matt’s New Look

Let’s just hope this is gone before After The Final Rose.

Matt Addresses the Women

Nothing says the Bachelor more so than the first Black Bachelor absolving a bunch of white women for being vicious, particularly towards the women of color.

Highlights from Previous Dates

Apparently we also lost upwards of three dates because we needed to prioritize petty drama instead. Although with one of them being the reinvention of Fear Factor and the other being the world’s most pathetic game of hide and seek, maybe we didn’t lose that much?

Hot Seats

The evening also had some fan favorites in the hot seat, doing a generic “I wish I knew why I was dumped” speech that is simultaneously everyone’s Bachelorette audition. I still have no idea who it is going to be next season now that Katie isn’t confirmed, but my guess is Abigail.

Welcome to the Roast

Matt in the hot seat also was given some feedback – most prevalently around how he keeps kissing women with his eyes open. We are subjected to a montage of him staring into the souls of his potential future partners.

Bloopers

And finally, we get a blooper reel, arguably one of the best parts of the season. Matt is shockingly super funny in them and I have to wonder – why didn’t we get any insight into his personality?

#Growth

Until next week.

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